How do you muster the confidence to move from emailing other professionals to actually calling and having a phone conversation with them?
Atiya of Atlanta, Ga
In the world of technology e-courage does not always translate to actual courage. It is so easy to hide behind a screen or keyboard in order to exchange in a “safe” manner. The reality is that know one can hide or safely exchange because at the click of a button or a quick search and anyone can find out where you live, work and play; then show up and confront you! While this does happen, it’s not that frequent because guess what? The people who you offend are also not that courageous. So consider the field leveled! People are just people no person is more significant than any other person. Society creates hierarchy’s and roles of authority in order to control and predict people. Those who are controlled by these created illusions are not truly free. FREE YOURSELF, by cancelling your subscription to these invisible boundaries!
Confidence is informed by competence and often people may feel incompetent or inadequate when it comes to calling people they do not know. Not only is it a different level of engagement than an email; it requires more vulnerability. I recommend that you do not over think the potential outcomes of calling because you may be tempted to give the thoughts in a negative direction way too much credence. The headwind created by thwarting thoughts can feel far more significant than they actually are… So let’s address some of the headwind; head on…
What if he/she doesn’t answer? Leave a message.
What if he/she doesn’t call me back? Follow up thrice; but no more, because you are not a stalker and they are not Jesus.
What if he/she never calls me back? Then you have lost nothing. Call someone else in order to achieve your objective.
What if he/she is mean to me? Then you can now make an informed decisions as to weather or not you want to work for or do business with him/her in the future.
What if I am bothering him/her? Let them tell you that and when they do, ask them for a better time to call them back.
This headwind is a classic case of fearing the unknown. I recommend dispelling that fear with FOCUS! Focus on your objective. What is your objective for calling? Once you have a clearly articulated objective, sandwich it between introductory pleasantries and appreciation. Now that you have a script, practice is a few times and then PICK UP THE PHONE! Focus on achieving your objective and squeeze all of the value out of the exchange. Once you have their attention and engagement; LISTEN to what they are telling you. If the topic shifts, regain focus by asking thoughtful and pointed questions pertinent to your objective. Take notes and be intentional about gathering all lessons, references, resources, recommendations and wisdom born from the conversation. For the most part, I think you will be pleasantly surprised, as most people enjoy talking about themselves and don’t mind sharing their knowledge and perspective with students and new professionals. More often than not, they will be flattered by your call and willing to invest the time required to assist you.
#LiveLove #SpeakLife #FreePeople
If you have a questions for Elle, please send it to AskElle@IntelligentIntentions.com and watch the blog for the response.